The Sweetness

pepperoni pizza
Uploaded by Freon.

One of the oddest moments I experienced in Kansas City was when Neon and I walked into a Pizza Parlor, Joe's Pizza I believe it was, over in Westport. We ordered our slices and sat down to eat. They had Parmesan cheese and crushed red pepper at the table, and I liberally sprinkled the red pepper like I always do. Now here's where things got out of wack. Sitting right there, next to the your basic pizza condiments, sat a little bear full of honey. That's right, honey. We kind of looked at each other with a WTF look. Maybe they serve breakfast or some kind of dessert I thought to myself. It couldn't possibly be for the pizza, right? People in Missouri couldn't be that fucked up, or could they? I finally had to stand up and ask?

I went to the counter and asked the hippy looking college student,"What's the honey for?"
"People put it on their pizza," he answered, he may have thrown in a dude or man at the end.

I almost screamed and ran out of the place, instead I sat back down. My mind going into overload. Honey, on pizza? No, please say it ain't so? Why God, why? My world was about to crash, so I grabbed the honey and poured it onto my pepperoni and crushed red pepper pizza. I looked out the window and everything seemed normal, maybe this wasn't going against the natural order of things. Maybe, just maybe, honey on pizza would be ok. I took a bite and tasted the sweet golden honey mixing in with the hot bite from the pepper and it was divine. Why, in 23 years of professional pizza eating, I'd never heard of this before only God knows, but it's excellent. Delicious. Spread the word.


Holy Starbucks Batman!

In my little 5 sq mile area of Las Vegas, there are 19 fucking Starbucks. Nineteen. That's crazy, why the hell are there so many? They can't all possibly be doing good business, or can they? Damn it, they're taking over the world, and nobody cares. Latte anyone? Check out you're area.


Come Fly With Me

Arrived back in Vegas last night around 10pm. My plane was delayed making me 2 hours late, but that just gave me 2 extra hours to hang out with Neon so not a problem.

The flight itself was actually pretty entertaining. Because of the delay some of my fellow passengers spent their waiting time in the bar. When they got on the plane they were already well on the way to being fucked up. It was hilarious watching the flight crew try to keep them under control. But, if you can't beat them join them, advice the crew took to heart. One of the attendants, the head guy by looks of things, actually sat down with the group and chatted with them for about 40 minutes. But that's not the best part.

When we first got on, there was a women, probabely in her late 30's, sitting alone. The drunk guys, late 40's, sat right behind her and started chatting her up almost instantly. At first she seemed kind of annoyed by them and a little standoffish. They offered her free drinks, and eventually asked her to sit with them, which she accepted. She sat inbetween them and had her free drinks. By the end of the flight she was making out with one of the guys and making plans to meet up with them later.

I couldn't believe how quick she turned from a cold bitch to slut. A slut because she had a boyfriend who she was meeting in Vegas. One of their favorite phrases during the flight, which she kept repeating, "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Ok, let's say that's true, it obviously made her feel better about herself saying it so much,but she wasn't even in Vegas yet. The flight into Vegas doesn't count you whore. If you're going to be a slut, at least have the common decency to do it in Vegas with everyone else. You're paying good money to do it in Vegas, if you're just going to do it on the plane then fly to Fargo, it's a lot cheaper. Slut.

Quite entertaining. A little jealous I admit. I wanted to fly the friendly skies too.


Free, Like the Wind

Neon and I watched House of Flying Daggers last night. ***spoilers***

It wasn't a bad movie but it didn't live up to my expectations, even though I enjoyed it and will probably own it. It had beautiful costumes, great vistas, and kickass fighting, but that should all be secondary to a great story, which unfortunately this does not have.

The backstory of the movies involves a secret faction called The House of the Flying Daggers. They have risen up to fight the tyrannical government officials. Two police officers, Leo and Jin, are given the task of killing the new leader of the Flying Daggers. They hear a rumor that a new dancer at the local brothel is actually a member and they decide to arrest her. After doing so they hatch a plan to have Jin break her free and have her take him back to the Flying Daggers headquarters. On the way, Jin and the dancer, Mei, fall in love. A little too predictable.

Doesn't sound like a bad plot and it's not, but the movie doesn't do a good job with it. It jumps around a lot, has twists that don't make sense, the backstory isn't developed enough that they could have left it out and nobody would have cared. The characters don't get developed enough either. When they die, I didn't care enough about them to be moved. Storywise this movie failed.

I pretty much felt the same after I watched Warriors of Heaven and Earth. Great cinematography, fighting, costumes, but lacking in story. Neither one made me care about the characters like Hero and Crouching... did.

Bottom line: good but not great.


Ay! Cabron*

I'm in Kansas City today, visiting Neon. She told me to bring warm clothes because of the cold, and I know all about being cold, I grew up in Wyoming, but the problem is I now live in Las Vegas. I brought my warm clothes, but what passes as warm clothes in Las Vegas ain't gonna do shit for you in a real winter. Way to fucking cold here, unless you have fur on your nuts.**

at: 8:54 pm CST
sky: fair (night)
Feels Like: -2°

*Here they say 'burr', in Mexico we say 'ay, cabron' which loosely translated means 'fuck'. Fuck!
**Lewis Black joke.


Old Men Are Great

An elderly gentleman of 83 arrived in Paris by plane. At the French customs desk, the man took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry-on bag.
"You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs officer asked, sarcastically. Whiting admitted he had been to France previously. "Then you should know enough to have your passport ready." The American said, "The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it."
"Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in France!" The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look. Then he quietly explained. "Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in 1944 to help liberate this country, I couldn't find any Frenchmen to show it to."


Crash and Burn

My sister's computer died a few days ago. I woke up and it was dead. I tried CPR but the bitch wouldn't reboot.(And yes, computers are females, and this one is a bitch. Something about computers taking on their owner's personalities or something.) I usually beat the computer into submission and have never had to call tech support, but this whore would not budge. So I called Dell support, waited less than 10 minutes, spent about 10 minutes talking to an Indian lady, judging by the accent. She seemed kind of lost on what the problem was so she skipped to replacing it which was fine by me.

Two days later, a fat tech showed up at my house, slapped a new hard drive into the bitch, rebooted and left. Gave me the sage advice that if I needed help, to call Dell. Thanks for nothing asshole, I could of done that much. Of course whatever he did didn't work. Computer was frozen. I ended up calling Dell again, speaking with a nice but slow as hell Indian fellow. "Please....type...M...as in Mary........ok, then...O as...in Oscar...." Damn dude, spit it out. He got me as far as formatting the drive and I took it from there. My first technical support experience and it wasn't that bad. I expected to spend weeks on the phone trying to draw blood from a stone. Thumbs up Dell, you expensive bastards.


Rise and Fall

A cool quote I heard on TV. It was a broadcast of a lecture at UNLV on Islam. I didn't catch the name of the speaker or the actual quote, but this is close enough. It really made me think:
The rise of Christianity happened when they strayed from the Bible, the fall of Islam happened when they strayed from the Koran.




To make resolutions for the new year or to not? What a conundrum. On one side, I make a decision to better myself, to grow as a person, to expand my interests. On the other hand, I say fuck it and go to sleep. Hmm, after 23 years of saying fuck it, who am to mess with tradition?

But alas, I'm a glutton for pain and discomfort. So I'll bite the bullet and make some resolutions for this coming year. I'm sure I can do it if I try but, well, we'll see if I try.

I couldn't think of what to do so I stole some ideas from Palinchron and that jogged my imagination and I came up with a few of my own.

  • Read 24 books, 12 of which must be non-fiction, and of the fiction only 6 can be fantasy or scifi
  • Do 10,000 situps, about 30 a day, starting tomorrow should be easy enough.
  • Start eating healthier, more veggies less pastries.
  • No more soda. Hahaha. That's a funny one. No seriously, the Pepsi I just had will be the last. Water from now on.
  • Watch more samurai movies. Hey I need some fun.
  • Be a better friend. Call people back, show up when I say I will, quit taking them for granted.
  • Build myself a computer. I built one for a friend but I want my own now.
  • Reach lvl 60 with one character in World of Warcraft.
  • Move out. This is a maybe, I'm not too sure I want to but if things go as they have been I need to get the fuck out of here. Either get a new roommate or live alone.
  • Write a comic, a good one.

Nice lofty goals, goals I can be proud of. I think we all know I'm kidding myself but maybe, just maybe.

Another One Bites The Dust

One more year, gone, game over, adios motherfucker. God, that sounds depressing.

In retrospect, it was an average year. A rollercoaster ride now that I think of it. Best part: Cancun - 2nd time to paradise, and even my family couldn't ruin it. A man could be happy here.

Cancun 028
Uploaded by Freon.

I traveled quite a bit, Cancun, Kansas City, Chihuahua, Huntington Beach. Not bad, but no where near the amount I wish I'd traveled.

Good year in books. I finished Stephen King's Dark Tower masterpiece. I caught up on George R. R. Martin's fantasy epic Song of Ice and Fire. The Da Vinci Code, Jennifer Government, Quicksilver. All excellent.

Great movies: Sideways, The Passion of the Christ, Shaun of the Dead, The Girl Next Door, Garden State, Baadasssss!, Irresistible, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, and too many more that I can't remember.

I got a new job, more money, that's always good. I got drunk a lot, can't complain about that. Got a new car, but then gave it back to my dad, waste of money in my opinion.

Opened the year on the Las Vegas Strip and closed it there as well. Last time though. I would much rather be at home watching New Year's celebrations from around the world on TV. Though this time around, I actually enjoyed the fireworks on the strip. All in perfect synch.

Filled up over half my iPod. That's not good. I'll need a new one before the year is over.

Yup, a good year. A good year, but thankfully it's over